One Year Anniversary

December 26th, 2009 marks the one-year anniversary to my corneal abrasion. Exactly that day one year ago, I got a big scratch on my right eye's cornea. I had to back out from being a pianist at a friend's wedding, and a thousand of inconveniences in the aftermath.

The Lord uses a very unique way to "celebrate" this anniversary with me. On December 20, I woke up with a sore right eye. I thought it was just either tiredness from the previous night, so I did not worry about it. The next day, December 21, symptoms of abrasion started to come back (i.e. slightly blurry vision, a bit of pain, sensitive to light ... thank God they were only minor so my daily routines were not affected). I was very afraid that the abrasion will occur once again. I prayed to God, "Lord, it has been a year since the first abrasion happened. I am not sure whether I can handle yet another relapse because it has happened several times and I'm tired of it. Plus, this week is a crucial week for work (A&W). Are you telling me to back off?" As I said my prayer, the Lord told me everything would be all right. You know, with the symptoms appearing, it's hard to believe everything would be all right. But I still prayed for faith and grace from the Lord, and moved on to my tasks.

I managed everything fine that day. The next day, the symptoms were still there and I prayed the same things, and again I managed fine. The routine repeated the entire week. On Boxing Day, which was the day of anniversary, I was concerned that I would collapse suddenly at A&W, while the shop was crazily busy. I would not be so concerned if I was not a supervisor at the shop, who had to oversee the entire cashier session that day. Praise the Lord, I woke up good-spirited (though I only had 5.5 hours of sleep - I had to get up at 5am), and I felt I had extra strength to work. I worked (and that means, standing) 13 hours straight that day, and I still felt fine at the end of the day. Of course, consequently, I slept for 12 hours that night to recuperate.

The day after (December 27), I read 2 Corinthians 12:7-10 on the Bible, and it made me reflect on the purpose behind last week's adventure, as well as the multiple recurrence of this illness through the year:

To keep me from becoming conceited because of these surpassingly great revelations, there was given me a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me. Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

又恐怕我因所得的啟示甚大 ，就過於自高，所以有一根刺加在我肉體上，就是撒但的差役要攻擊 我，免得我過於自高 。為這事 ，我三次求過主 ，叫這刺離開我。他對我說 ： 我的恩典夠你用的，因為我的能力是在人的軟弱上顯得完全。所以 ，我更喜歡誇自己的軟弱，好叫基督的能力覆庇我。我為基督的緣故，就以軟弱 、凌辱、急難、逼迫、困苦為可喜樂的 ；因我甚麼時候軟弱， 甚麼時候就剛強了。

The Lord made me accept my appearance with glasses through the multiple relapses. Like most of the girls on earth, I would like to look pretty, and I thought I looked better in contact lenses. So, I always calculated the days I had to wait before I can wear contact lenses again while I was ill. God punished me for my disobedience. Through the relapses, He told me it was not the way it's supposed to be. Whatever ways God made it in, they are always good, so I should gladly accept them.

Last week's incidents were just another proof of God's abundant grace. If God did not sustain me, I don't know if I could manage the intense work at A&W that week. Also, I think God was trying to tell me, "See, Quennie, I have gone through this entire year with you, and you come out fine."

Though I am weak, God makes me strong. It's so true. Amen.